Archive for the ‘Smoking & Quitting’ Category


I am SOOO excited, I got a call from Shands today and my surgery has been moved up! I am scheduled NOW for JULY 27th!! That is me and Walter’s One year anniversary! I think that’s pretty cool!

Now I am getting excited cus that’s like a bit over a month, I have an appointment next wen for my weigh in at Shands and my anesthesiology / pre-op apt is for July 15th.  I think she said that I would have to start my liquid diet on the 30th to, but I’m not sure, cus that would be a month of liquid diet!

I have been waiting for so long for this and am really excited about getting healthy and loosing the weight! Everyone has been a great support, Walt, mom, mini and even Michelle who has had a bad experience with the procedure, shes been telling me lots of diff things to be ready for!

OTHER Updates:

  • Puppies are getting HUGE
  • Kids are in MD safe and sound
  • Cheyenne passed 6th grade by the skin of her teeth
  • I have been drinking more water and less tea!
  • I am into my 4th month of being SMOKE FREE!

no smoking for over 3 months!

3 months


IT Feels Great to be able to say I have gone this long, I LOVE Vaping!




I am soooo proud of us! We both have been Analog free for 2 months!
We are awsome!

We Deserve a Free E-Cig!

Christopher Elijah & Larry

Heard from my brother, hes doing okay and really want to see the baby! He wants me to send him some E-cigs and juice so he can be smoke free when he finally gets leave and is able to see the baby who is getting to be HUGE, hes a big boy! Takes after us I guess ;) Hes a Pumpkin, I cant wait to see him when they fianally get over here.

Thats actually why Larry called, I have to figure out the best way to get her here. Since they are both still married it is gonna be a little harder to get the right paperwork for customs. I called Holly and she is gonna help me look into it.

Here is a recent pics of my lil nephew! Hes so adorable!

Three weeks – No Smoke!









Okay, so no real eater baskets or Easter egg hunts, Walters mom made all 6 kids Easter baskets so we just blindfolded all the kids and threw 100plus eggs on the floor and let them find them while blindfolded, it was quite entertaining for us adults!  They kept letting go of their baskets and could not find them lol!!

It’s amazing, a little bit of change and one dollar bills in some of the eggs got them Sooo eggsited! (hehe) I also had little pet shops and matchbox cars in some.

Still waiting on my passthru for my 510 ;( was not in the mail today:(

Oh, and my 510’s battery died today, so I grabbed a pack of smokes thinking I would just smoke one or two till i was able to get home to charge mine, and I lit it took 1 ta 2 drags and thru it out the window…OMG it was fucking NASTY, felt like I inhaled and ashtray and made me sick to my tummy…

I am glad I did it though, cus now I will NEVER EVER go back to ciggs & no more craving for a real cig!

I’d Curl under a rock but I would prolly get bite by a snake!

Where to start, omg it has been the absolute WORST day I have had since I have been in Florida!

The day started By my oldest daughter Cheyenne’s birthday Fish “turtle” dying, we had a toilet funeral followed by little girls crying over a carnival goldfish her sister won for her on her birthday last week. This was a great start to my day! So I sent Walter to the pet store with $20 and had the kids pick out fishies, they got 7 of them, a guppy, some neons and a blue fish & pink fish (insert Dr Seuss comment here). anyway this was NOTHING…

Next in my fucked up day I was outside cleaning out the fish-tank when Julia came outside telling Cheyenne she needed her, I could tell by the look on her face something was wrong… After asking her 3 or 4 times (and prolly about 6 gallons of water later) she finally told me there was water all over the floor in the kitchen.

I ran inside to find my kitchen, laundry, kids bathroom,  hall and entrance to Sierra’s room under water, The water decided it did not want to shut off in the washing machine…There was probably an inch and a 1/2 of water on the floor!  We used EVERY towel in the house including some blankets to soak up the water, there wasn’t a towel left & now we have No washer…UGG

Okay now that was the BEST part of the day!

Walter came home from the pet store cus I told him about the water and When he saw I had cleaned it up the best I could he left again to go get the fish filter at walmart, only to call me not even 5 minute after he left! He had a damn flat tire, thank god he was only 1/2 mile or less from the house thru the woods (not the flood) and was able to drive it back here. I called my step dad to come get him to go pick the bunk beds we were suppose to go get at 6pm, and they went and got them while I wiggled my fat ass under the truck – trying to figure out HOW to release the spare tire from under the truck cus I didn’t have that long bar thing that slides into the hole beside the license plate. 30 minutes later Me and Stan figured it out (I called him) and I was able to get it down as Walter walked thru the yard.

He started to put the tire on the truck and ended up having a Hell of a time jacking the truck up, we only had 2 small jacks and a X-shaped crow bar,  that was to big to spin, he ended up having to dig a hole in the ground to jack it up with a jack -only to be able to use the OTHER jack…LMAO. (note hole in groun in picture and him all pushing as hard as he can & TWO jacks).

We are STILL NOT to the Best Part of the day!

Okay, so we get tire fixed and we STILL need fish filter ( at this point im ready to flush em ALL). Walter goes to get it and takes Cheyenne and Amber with him. He calls me about 15/20 minutes later telling me the truck over heated in Dunnellon and wont start…FUCKING GREAT… for about 5 minutes I kept telling him this is NOT funny and he better not keep fucking with me! He WAS NOT fucking with me…anyway he called his mom and she bought a battery for us, and it DID start but it overheating, so I guess we will see what happens tomorrow. He managed to get it to Chauncy’s work- that spa place….

And to TOP off the fucking day, i had NO CLUE that tomorrow was his daughters 4th Birthday! Now I have No birthday present and No transportation! FUCKING AWSOME DAY I tell you. I’d go and Curl under a rock but I would prolly get bite by a snake!

Seems the new meds are working cus I didn’t KILL anyone or Cry! I do however have my first craving for a real cigarette!

Two weeks no smoking




IT Feels Great to be able to say I have gone this long, i LOVE Vaping!


1 week Smoke Free!




IT Feels Great to be able to say I have gone a week with not ONE ciggerette!


My 510’s came!!!!

Okay, so it started out to be an AWSOME day, roads are still flooded so I sent Walter out to get the mail this morning, No Birthday cards filled with money, actually I didn’t get ANY birthday cards :( BUT….I got my Joye 510 e-cig  from Nicotine Nirvana today and OMG this thingis GREAT! It really really gives you a huge throat hit and feels just like your smoking, well plus I got all my weird flavors from MsT’s bakeryand they were awesome (vaping on some Snicker-doodle Cookies right now!) Plus shes very Cheap – $5.00 a bottle, which lasts about  the same as a carton of cigs!

Excited about tomorrow & finishing up all my tests for the Gastric and getting it out of the way!

 I woke up at 6:50AM this morning to My brother, he was calling from Afghanistan, he said he was pissed cus he was in tents with no heat or electric, I found a picture of how he described it, he said it was green rolling hills and mountains in the background. He is not in this picture, I just found this of Internet of Afghanistan.  

He said besides the living in the tents, no elec and no heat it is gorgeous there. Hes in a pretty safe place, pretty desolate.

He didn’t remember it was my birthday, but that’s Okay, at least I heard from him and I reminded him. Jade brought me over a birthday cake, but I didn’t have the heart to tell her i don’t like peach jam, she had texted me last night and asked if we liked “peaches’ and of course I LOVE the fruit itself, but had no clue she was gonna put it in the cake lol, I scraped it off and just ate the rest, and it was pretty good! Yummy.

Well That’s enought for now, ttyl

More Rain & Cheyennes Birthday Party

Okay, It was a very long day that started with RAIN, like we needed anymore of that (refer to image of “lake” road about 5 posts ago).  About Noon I sent Walter out for some more chips, rolls and crap to make the party punch and of course Cheyenne’s Cheesecakes.  Everyone was calling asking me if the road was passable and we opted to meet most on the other side and bring them across since I have a truck and we know the road (or where the road WAS). Walter Picked up a few kids and then come home to ferry the rest across and everything was great. Cheyennes friends showed up and they all had a pretty good time.

Toward the end we had Gabby go home crying cus of Sierra and The boy that was here, CJ (Jennifers BF)  ended up getting “beat up” by 3 of the older kids here, I really think they were just playing but apparently one of them hit his head and hit a bit hard cus CJ ended up having to go to the hospital, he has a lot of medical issues anyways, so the hit to the head didn’t make it any better.  Needless to say, I had the sheriff come out and had to give my version of what had happened, I really dont think they MENT to hurt him, you know how it is when a bunch of pre-teen girls get around ONE boy…. Love taps…

No Smoking again and with all the stress today it was the perfect do or die test, I even stood outside with 2 friends while they smoked, didn’t even bother me!  My damn Blu battery keeps dying on me today though. That kind of sucks!

House isn’t to much of a mess, so I think I will call it a night and pass out a little early tonight. 

Getting nervous about surgery now, hoping medicade and everything this comming week goes well. My Birthday is in like a day and a half and that will be my 4/5 week Pre-Op point!!

Day 3 (aprox 6 weeks post-op)

Day 3

Okay there is not to much going on today, I just got finished decorating for Cheyenne’s b-day pary, the pictures are not really that clear, damn verizon has been resizing pics before they send em.  Anna and the girls stopped by and had some subs, I wish she would stay to talk longer, I miss talking to friends and It seems like she is always busy and has to rush off.

Anyways, I am doing okay on smoking still cant wait to get the 510 elec cig I ordered. Seems like it’s really not gonna be as difficult as I thought!

Well I know this entry is not very long, but I am tired and I will have a house full of semi-teens tomarrow!


Day 2 (aprox 6 weeks pre-op)

 March 19th
Proud of myself, a full 24 hours and not a single cigg which is good considering I have been smoking for over 17 years, and don’t think in the past 7 years have gone anywhere near that long without a single puff. It wasn’t as bad as I had thought, I had my patch on, and my Blu.. which i used sparingly, I think the main time I wanted a cigg was after I ate, but that is so out of habit!

No baby food trials tonight, hell no …even though I found about 15 more damn jars, but I am not going anywhere near them until i HAVE to. I don’t know If my tummy ever recovered after last nights baby food taste testing.

Cheyenne turned 13 today, a teen..whoo hooo…so excited…. NOT! She will always be my baby. I think she enjoyed all the presents she got. The other kids all went to the carnival at the school.

My mom gave me a $60 gift certificate to Kay’s Jewelry to find a new pendant for my necklace, I think I was to get a Piggy or something, kinda as a reminder. I looked at their site and all I found was a fat penguin!  Hehe, but gotta admit he is kinda cute, but I will go to the store & look more.

I did what I thought was my psych evaluation this morning, but i ended up only doing an Intake and almost went off on them when they told me I had to wait aprox 4 weeks for my next apt, to get the evaluation done. I cried, as always and demanded that they see me before next week as it took me almost 2 months to get that far and i was NOT gonna risk loosing my surgery dates over this. The lady excused herself and came back moments later, the managed to “fit me in” next wen. the 24th at 12:45, which is the same day as my Upper GI – but that’s at 9:30 AM. I really don’t understand why I even have to go back, I was there for about 3 plus hours today telling my life history, i honestly think the intake workers do all the work & tell the actual shrink what to say.

Well, its almost 1 am, going to get some sleep because I feel like I have been on the run all week and my body is starting to really ache.


Day 1 – (aprox 6 weeks Pre-Op)

March 18th – Midnight,
YUCK, how do babies eat baby food! I sat down with my kids today and tried various baby foods, so I know what I like and don’t, i Seriously almost threw up!! I tried things like Chick & stars, spaghetti, butternut squash, mac & cheese, turkey & gravy, peas…OMG they are nasty, I did however like the square see-thr container baby foods, but only the fruits. Even an hour after trying the baby food my stomach is feeling NOT-so-good! My surgery will probably be April 20 or 27th – if everything goes according to plan, My psych eval is in the morning & Upper GI is Wen, that’s the last test i need, then they can submit my paperwork to medicaid and we can prey from there.

My boss has had surgery and shes been a help, and my kids and mom are very supportive as well, hell the kids were egging me on about trying the baby food with me tonight! The 2 week Before surgery Liquid diet worries me a bit, and the quitting smoking, but I HAVE to do these things or I will NOT get the gastric.

I can not Gain any weight before surgery, and I am currently at 424.5 according to their scales at Shands.

Okay I am smoking my last cigarette, and I really do need to quit.. The blu electronic cig will help and I found out today from the Dr’s at Shands that They are fine and not really looking for Nicotine. I also ordered a Joye 510 and 13 new e-liquid flavors.

Things I Have to do soon!:
Less sugar in tea
QUIT smoking
Eat less, more
find protein shake I like


(will post later)